The loss of my childhood memories felt like emptiness

When in fact they were not lost but repressed

Reliving them made me feel disgusted, sad and afraid

I now understand why I kept pushing them away

I also remember the good of my childhood and that was

I picked a lot of flowers, laughed with friends and loved my dog

Retrieving what made my inner child, Leentje, cry and laugh

Is like finding a part of my identity, the good and the bad