🖊 WRITE 🖊

My life only begins when I can safely submit—complete surrender. Because behind all my mechanisms, there is a sensual, spicy part eagerly waiting to submit safely and completely. Right? Why would my life only begin then, and what would I do differently? I would be more open to exploring our sensuality, discovering and enjoying each other and all the beauty life has to offer. I get physically warm just thinking about it. This physical warmth feels less tense when experienced together. Alone, it’s as warm as a sudden summer day of 38 degrees—overwhelming and sometimes unpleasant, but together, the same warmth seems as bearable and even pleasant as in a sauna. I go to a sauna to get warm or even hot, with the thought that I will come out lighter, with a calmer feeling. So what would my life look like with him? HOT!

So how do I experience this heat without a papi close to me? (Tantra?)

A sub-question: which thoughts make me feel physically warmer? (Deep eye contact, slow pace, physical closeness, his hot body temperature*). That is probably the direction where the answer to the main question can be found.

*Okay, these things don’t necessarily make me feel much warmer right away🥲, but they do bring about an uncontrollable, spontaneous smile on my face. So I guess I’m getting closer.